Image via Indiatoday.com
Key Sonia Gandhi aide, Ahmed Patel, denied rumours that he’s been asked to stay on and assist the Namo regime. The rumours gained credence in the wake of a slew of “Modi unhappy about..” articles, such as this one, finding their way into the front pages of leading dailies, leading many to suspect the hand of Patel in it.
Patel is considered the pre-eminent practitioner of this craft, having planted hundreds of “Sonia unhappy” articles and forged close working relationships with many media houses during the course of this illustrious career. One of his plants for The Unreal Times, “Sonia Gandhi’s unhappiness scales news heights, she refuses to eat at restaurant during happy hours”, is considered the gold standard in this genre. The fact that Modi values professionals also lent weight to speculation that Patel had been retained.
Patel however categorically denied the rumors. “Planting an “XYZ is unhappy” article is a higher art, boss, requiring a certain flair and finesse in conveying the pathos of the subject the way my articles conveyed the sense of Soniaji’s helplessness. These recent articles don’t measure up to my standards. I think Modiji must have been genuinely upset, considering the comatose economy and dysfunctional bureaucracy he has inherited from the UPA regime, leading some feckless PMO bureaucrat to leak these rather amateurish perspectives. However, if Modiji continues to remain unhappy, he will need to engage the services of a virtuoso like me very soon.”
PMO officials also seconded Patel’s claim. “We wish we could say it was the handiwork of the master but we did this in-house. Modi’s aides also want to push ‘Modi angry about’ as opposed to ‘Modi unhappy about’ pieces and there is a raging debate about this,” an official on condition of anonymity revealed.
Patel said he’s now retiring from active politics, and is in talks with Penguin India to publish his compilation of plants for various media channels as a coffee-table book, titled “The 835 things that made Sonia unhappy between 2004 and 2014: An Anthology”.
(For more on shenanigans of Ahmed Patel in the UPA II regime, read our best-seller, Unreal Elections)