(Image via intoday.in)
RSS has announced its most ambitious Ghar Wapasi campaign to date, that of bringing high profile American Presidential contender, Bobby Jindal, back to the Hindu fold. The RSS top brass took the decision to press ahead despite the heavy odds.
“Look, we know what we are up against after reading those #YoBobbysoWhite jokes. It’s probably easier getting Hafiz Saeed all gooey eyed about his Hindu roots and sporting a tika than having Bobby re-embrace his ancestral faith,” RSS chief Mohan Bhagwat conceded.
“But the thing is,” the RSS supremo continued, “there has to be a Punjabi Hindu lurking somewhere deep inside Bobby. I mean, who except a Punjabi keeps a name like Bobby? Anyway, we have over 50 years of experience in this business. If anyone can pull it off, it’s us. We’ll start by screening DDLJ for him as a warm up act. If that goes well, we’ll get him to watch Ekta Kapoor’s Mahabharat and gift copies of Amish Tripathi’s Shiva Trilogy to facilitate a soft entry as the next step in the Ghar Wapasi and take it from there.”
The RSS plans have predictably come in for criticism from secular parties. “Bobby Jindal needs to be reacquainted with India, not Hindutva,” Congress spokesperson, Randeep Surjewala, snarled. Bihar CM Nitish Kumar was more qualified in his criticism. “The right way to go about this is to make Bobby aware of his caste identity, that of a Punjabi baniya. That and a heavy dose of Indian secularism is the way to go about it if we want to reap strategic dividends,” Nitish opined.