In a shocking display of insensitivity, wannabe satire portal The UnReal Times called former Prime Minister Dr. Manmohan Singh a lameduck, dehati aurat, poodle, worst-PM-ever, Robot on microblogging site Twitter, while Tweeters all around them were doing the decent thing by congratulating him for being chosen for Japan’s second-highest civilian award.
Japan’s love affair with robots continues @RT Manmohan Singh chosen for Japan national award – The Hindu http://t.co/Usw6fEjun7 …
— The UnReal Times (@TheUnRealTimes) November 3, 2014
Within seconds of the tweet being published, shit hit the fan, as tweeters of all colours and hues lambasted the satire handle for its poor taste.
“This is disappointing,” said a Tweeter.
“SANGHI TROLL!” said another gentleman.
“The least you can do is call Modi a ‘mass murderer‘ in the interest of neutrality,” advised a prominent intellectual.
“Disgraceful and unfunny comment, especially on a day the former PM has been honored with such a prestigious award,” said yet another Tweeter. When The UnReal Times pointed out that no one blinked at their robot references when he was India’s PM which is arguably more prestigious than receiving a Japanese award, the gentleman scoffed, “Have you been living in a cave? Everyone knows who the real PM was. This award is obviously way more prestigious!” upon which The UnReal Times quickly deleted its tweet and lapsed into a sullen silence.
“Ethhey gaad doonga tennu,” said Dr Singh when our reporter asked him for a comment
News of the incident eventually made its way to Dr Manmohan Singh’s ears, and the two-time Prime Minister was not amused. “Dr. Singh has had enough. As a mark of protest, he will now take a Turing Test and shame critics who repeatedly call him a robot,” said former media adviser, Pankaj Pachauri. The Turing Test, as some readers may know, is a test of a machine’s ability to exhibit intelligent behaviour equivalent to, or indistinguishable from, that of a human.
According to insiders, Dr Singh initially treated the said tweet as he treats everything else – with his usual stoic demeanour – even as his better half Gursharan Kaur tittered in the background. But once tweets outraging over the insult began pouring in, some from handles sympathetic to Congress, Dr Singh decided to play it safe and take offense, just in case that happened to be the official position of the party.
Later, in a press conference convened outside his residence, Dr. Singh unleashed the full extent of his wrath. “I condemn in strongest terms the attack on me on the day I was chosen for Japan’s top civilian award. I also thank tweeters for their prompt and decisive response, and for their unstinting support to me,” he deadpanned, and promptly turned and walked out of the gathering, towards a car waiting to take him to IIT Delhi’s Artificial Intelligence Center.
The BJP, meanwhile, has refused to comment on this issue. “All this is amusing but we are not saying anything in support of The UnReal Times, lest those jokers start bugging us for payment once again,” said spokesperson Sambit Patra. “As it is, they are paining us every day by mailing us screenshots of random tweets that claim that they are on BJP payrolls.”
Later in the evening, Twitter gossip handle @LutyensMasala tweeted, “Results of MMS’ Turing Test are out. Vigorous and tense activity at Lutyens as Congress high command rushes to hide the results. Make of it what you may.”
(Headline based on this tweet by @themahoot. With inputs from Ajayendar Reddy)